Tom Brady – the NFL’s Nixon?

July 29, 2015

From the standpoint of stupid, it’s hard to beat Deflategate. It’s a writer’s dream, a story that keeps getting more and more bizarro.

NFL commish Roger Goodell – hardly the paragon of Alexandrian leadership – has nonetheless grown a spine and upheld his four-game ban of New England Patriots’ quarterback Tom Brady, which followed an NFL-commissioned report concluding Brady probably knew that two Pats’ employees had deflated the team’s footballs before the A.F.C. Championship game with the Indianapolis Colts. ...

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Is Tom Brady going down?

July 24, 2015

Tom Brady has apparently made the NFL an offer it can refuse.

The NFL Players Association, on behalf of the Deflategator, has offered to have Tommy Boy pay a big fine in lieu of a four-game suspension. The overture has “met with silence” in the office of commish Roger Goodell, who heard Brady’s appeal June 23. The New England Patriots’ quarterback is prepared to make a federal case out of this should he be suspended for probably having knowledge of subordinates deflating footballs in the A.F.C. Championship game against the Indianapolis Colts earlier this year. But the fact that the Players Association has put out an offer seems like the moment in a crime show when the defense looks to plea bargain. And that suggests a certain guilt ...

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Deflategate – of waistlines, frown lines and men

May 15, 2015

Deflategate gets curiouser and curiouser and curiouser. Now the New England Patriots would have you believe that it wasn’t about deflated balls but inflated bladders and waistlines.

In an attempt to seize control of the narrative, the Pats now contend that the time equipment manager Jim McNally spent in the bathroom before the AFC Championship game against the Indianapolis Colts wasn’t about emptying balls of their air but emptying his bladder. And his “Deflator” nickname referred to his trying to lose weight.

You know that when men start talking about their waistlines and their bladders it’s a sure sign they’re desperate.

I think, in the end, however, that we shall discover that this is less a story about waistlines than frown lines and perhaps being a step slower and seeing the young guns who idolize you making their way up the ranks, standing across the field where you once were.

Tom Brady has it all except for one thing – youth. Turning 38 on Aug. 3, he’s actually a middle-aged man. (The life expectancy for an American man is 76.4 years. What’s two times 38? Oh.) ...